On the days you don't want to...

 Honestly, I just didn’t want to do it today. 

    This morning, I woke up in a slump. I felt heavy. My alarm went off to go to workouts and I did not want to go. At all. I went home and took a nap after the workout, and still felt heavy. Woke up from my nap, and honestly, the last thing I wanted to do was open my bible and spend time with the Lord. I just didn’t want to do it today. 

     I didn’t want to surrender, I didn’t want to find the Joy of the Lord, I didn’t want to work at everything I did in a way that was fitting for the Lord, I didn't want to find contentment...

I just didn’t want to. 

    And to be completely honest this isn’t the first time I have had this type of day. This type of day actually happens often. Yeah I’m a Christian, and yes I'm even studying to go into ministry, but I have days like this all of the time. The truth is, you will not find one Christian that wakes up every day and does it all right. Even Paul, one of the boldest and well-known apostles, acknowledged in His letter to the Corinthians, “For I am the least of these”, confessing that He even had days where he was so undeserving of the gift of Christ's forgiveness and love… Every single follower of Christ has days when they wake up and just don't want to do it. Why? Because we are human, and we are broken. 

    But Jesus already knew this. He knew that we were going to have these days. And because of His perfect goodness and faithfulness, He died for the days we don’t want to do it. He knew that if He let us follow the “wants” of our hearts every day, that we would be destined to death. 

    With His death on the cross, we gained forgiveness for these days. With His resurrection, He gave us the gift of the Holy Spirit that equips us on these days that enemy desires to pull us from our Savior. And He gave us His word, to guide us on how to live a righteous and fulfilled life when these days come.

    So if Paul even had these days, why did he go down in history as one of the greatest apostles and followers of Jesus? 

    Because on the days, he didn’t want to; He did it anyway. 

    We can see in the Bible that with the gift of forgiveness, and equipment of the Holy Spirit, He also gives us a command. A command that we are called to follow every day, but especially on the days, your flesh doesn't want to follow Him… 

This command is found in Matthew 16. 

    “Then Jesus said to His disciples, “whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.””

    As someone who has had many days where “I just don’t want to do it”, I have been on both sides. I have let the enemy's whispers get to me, and lived out my flesh desires, and I have also taken up my cross and followed Jesus despite my flesh not wanting to. 

    And let me be the first to tell you; taking up your cross is the best choice that you could ever make. 

Yes, it’s okay to not be perfect. Yes, it’s okay to wake up and be honest about not wanting to follow the Lord that day. If we were perfect we wouldn’t need a Savior and with vulnerability comes freedom. 

    But on those days when you wake up and feel heavy and the last thing you want to do is dive into the Word, or work at the to-do list that day with your whole heart; DO IT ANYWAY. 

    The biggest lie that the enemy can try to get you to believe is that surrendering your life to the Lord and taking up your cross is the quickest way to lose it… 

    But Jesus says right after the command to take up your cross to His disciples, “Whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life will find it.” 

    The enemy wants nothing more than to twist the word of God and whisper these lies of destruction and death to you. But remember, you are equipped. 

The quickest way to fight these lies is to take up your cross. 

    Jesus says, “whoever wants to be my disciple…” 

So ask yourself, do you want to be a disciple of God? 

He gives life and gives life ABUNDANTLY. 

That abundant living starts with choosing to pick up your cross, and simply follow the Lord. Even on the days when you don't want to.


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